Weight Loss Information

Pizza, French Fries, Beer and Other Diet Foods


Now this is the real American Dream! I'm here to let you know that it is totally possible to lose all the fat you want while eating nothing but junk food. The only hitch is that all the fat you want to lose is going to have to be zero!

Here are some tongue-in-cheek (or burger-in-belly) suggestions for how you can turn even the greasiest, sugariest, most overprocessed calorie bomb into lean, mean diet food.

How is this done? Here's a hint: it's all in how you choose to look at the food...

  • Eat donuts instead of solid pastries. You will be saving a tremendous number of calories by eating something with a hole in the middle. You can save upwards of 3 to 5 calories per pastry by doing this. That means if you eat 10 donuts, you've saved yourself almost 50 calories! Besides, everyone knows nuts are good for you...

  • French fries can help prevent heart attacks. It is a fact that French people suffer fewer heart attacks and have lower rates of heart disease. French fries are obviously from France, therefore it naturally follows that French fries can prevent heart disease.

  • Pizza is one of the healthiest foods on the planet. There are many reasons for this:

    • The bleached flour in the crust sucks up all the grease that drips down from the toppings, trapping it so you don't see it while you're eating. If you don't see it when you eat it, it has no calories.

    • It's round (stay with me here). Because square-shaped foods have corners, they contain a lot more calories than round foods. To save even more calories, cut a hole in the center of the pizza (refer back to #1 for full details).

    • The cheese on the pizza is loaded with calcium - even more than the Tums you're going to need after eating the whole thing.

    • You can easily reduce your servings without sacrificing enjoyment. Instead of cutting the pizza into 8 slices, try cutting it into only 4. You've just eaten HALF the number of slices you ate before! Imagine how many calories you'll save by doing that!

    • Vegetables covered in grease are still vegetables. Never mind that all the nutrition has been baked out of them, you're still getting you're recommended daily servings of veggies.

    • There is plenty of fiber in the paper that's stuck to the bottom of the pizza. Don't be afraid of it.

  • Beer is the absolute best beverage you can drink when you're watching your waistline. It helps to put it right out there in front you where you can see it.

  • Look for foods that have air bubbles in them. Examples include chocolate bars, Twinkies (after you suck the cream filling out), soda pop, sponge cake, and cheese puffs. As you know, air has no calories. Look at these foods as the wrapping for a low-calorie, low-fat serving of air.

  • Putting ketchup on anything makes it healthy. Think about it. You're getting your vegetables in a concentrated paste. It's like stepping into the future... today!!

  • Here are a number of delicious, zero-calorie foods you may not be aware of:

    • Anything eaten while standing has zero calories.

    • Anything eaten off somebody else's plate has zero calories.

    • Food sampled for "tasting" purposes during preparation has no calories.

    • Food sneaked from someone after you distract them is also calorie-free.

    • Anything eaten after the expiration date contains no calories.

  • Eating ice cream can actually help you burn an enormous amount of calories. The key to this lies in its temperature.

    Ice cream is very cold. When you eat ice cream, your body must expend energy (a.k.a. calories) to warm it up to your internal body temperature.

    When you work through the scientific formulas for heat conversion, you can see you will end up expending approximately 6,000 calories to heat up a small dish of ice cream to body temperature. Drinking ice cold beer with your ice cream amplifies this effect.

    These diet tips should have you well on your way towards effectively peeling off pounds of unsightly fat.

    Think of me next time you're eating a pizza with french fries and ketchup on top, dunking your donuts in a glass of cold beer, and shoving down Twinkies (with the filling sucked out) mashed into a dish of nice cold ice cream!

    DISCLAIMER: The preceding information is not medical advice and should not be taken as such. If you feel the urge to take any of this "information" seriously, please lie down until the feeling goes away. Thank you.

    About The Author

    Nick Nilsson is Vice President of BetterU, Inc., an online exercise, fitness, and personal training company. Check out his latest eBook "The Best Exercises You've Never Heard Of" at http://www.thebestexercises.com or visit http://www.fitstep.com. You can contact him at betteru@fitstep.com or subscribe to BetterU News, his fitness newsletter at betterunews@fitstep.com.


    MORE RESOURCES:

    Houston Weight Loss Surgeons Discuss How to Choose the Right Bariatric Practice
    San Francisco Chronicle (press release)
    Drs. Yu and Scarborough discuss key aspects to look for in a practice before undergoing a weight loss procedure such as gastric plication to help improve results and get patients back on track towards leading a healthier life.

    and more »


    USA TODAY

    Weight loss: Clinics halt Lap-Band surgeries amid controversy | MassDevice.com ...
    Mass Device
    MASSDEVICE ON CALL — A pair of outpatient clinics in Los Angeles stopped offering weight-loss surgeries using the Lap-Band gastrointestinal device amid ongoing controversy over a marketing campaign. The FDA late last year issued warning letters to 8 ...
    Clinics halt Lap-Band surgeriesLos Angeles Times
    Lap-Band surgeries halted at two LA clinicsUSA TODAY
    Allergan stops selling Lap-Band to 1-800-GET-THIN doctorsInjuryBoard.com
    California Healthline -French Tribune
    all 55 news articles »


    Dallas Weight Loss Surgeon Adds Bariatrician
    Sacramento Bee
    As a Board Certified Bariatrician, Dr. Obi will head up the Bariatric Solutions AfterCare program as well as assisting patients during their pre surgery diet requirement for the weight loss surgeries performed at Bariatric Solutions: Lap Band, ...

    and more »


    eMaxHealth

    The 'fit but fat' debate: Weight loss should still be the goal, experts say
    Chicago Tribune
    WEIGHT LOSS STILL THE GOAL Though these findings appear to support the idea that you can be fit but fat, scientists note that the rate of MNBO is very rare within the obese population, and the risk for mortality is still high among the obese, ...
    The No-Gimmick Secret to Losing Weight for FreeeMaxHealth

    all 2 news articles »


    Weight-loss couple urge others to take up challenge
    This is Plymouth
    A COUPLE from Devonport embracing the loveLIFE campaign have lost five of their 15 stone weight loss target. Chris Searle, aged 30, and Charlotte Telling, aged 25, who are both unemployed, signed up to The Herald's loveLIFE campaign to help improve the ...

    and more »


    Weight-loss methods tested
    The Bay of Plenty Times
    The indulge team and readers test old and new weight-loss methods and Bay dietitian Rachel Scrivin adds her expert opinion. A high protein, low-carbohydrate diet devised by French nutritionist Pierre Dukan. It has grown in popularity over the last year ...



    Politico

    Weight Loss: Rick Warren's New Purpose
    Huffington Post
    By Lilly Fowler LAKE FOREST, Calif. (RNS) Megachurch pastor Rick Warren has become an outsized evangelical superstar: best-selling author of "The Purpose Driven Life" series, pastoral mentor and even political referee. Now Warren is finding a new ...
    Rick Warren finds a new purpose: weight lossThe Christian Century
    Rick Warren gets rid of excess weight using the Saddleback "Daniel Plan ...God Discussion

    all 6 news articles »


    Daily Mail

    Dawn French discusses weight loss on This Morning in dress with bright and ...
    Daily Mail
    She spoke about her weight loss, kissing Michael Buble and working with Simon Cowell - which she said was still a mystery to her. No more weight loss talk, please! Dawn told hosts Holly Willoughby and Phillip Schofield that she was bored with people ...
    Dawn French on slim new figure: 'I refuse to dislike my other body!'hellomagazine.com
    Dawn French has the blast laughThe Sun

    all 9 news articles »


    PR Web (press release)

    MonavVie Launches 90-Day Weight Loss "RVLUTION" With Its RVL Weight Management ...
    PR Web (press release)
    Health and wellness leader MonaVie has launched the “90-day MonaVie RVLution,” a weight loss movement that uses its RVL Premier Weight Loss System in combination with Venice Nutrition Creator and NY Times Bestselling Author Mark Macdonald's “Body ...

    and more »


    Study Warns Low Protein Diets May Cause More Than Just Weight Loss
    Daily Glow
    He found that while this type of diet is an effective weight loss tool, it comes at the cost of lean body mass, according to a report by The New York Times. Lean body mass, simply put, is everything in your body that is not fat.
    Lee McCaskill offers 'belly bustin' tipsTCPalm
    My scale won't budge! Why am I not losing weight?The Voice of Mini Cassia (blog)

    all 2 news articles »

    Google News

  • home | site map | Home Site
    © 2006